Before
by GoodTwin
Summary: AU season three. Tara's freshmen year of college, Faith angry at the world, and a chance meeting turns out to be the work of the PTB. Rated M for language
1. Chapter 1

**Before**

Chapter 1

Life wasn't much better here in Sunnydale than in New Mexico. She was still a loner, no friends, no one to see past her vale of hair. But Donny wasn't here with his sickening leers and comments about her larger than most girls' breast that made Tara feel very uncomfortable and dirty. Donny couldn't get into her room when her Mom and Dad were out to eat with friends, not that her dad liked these so called friends it was always just for image sake, and hold Tara down making her bleed making her feel even dirtier. And her father wasn't here, no fist to the face, and backhands that sent her into the fridge for burning breakfast no late night beatings with the end of his belt, the one with the sharp pointed metal tip. And cousin Beth wasn't anywhere near her hair with a sharp pair of scissors and a cruel laugh as she cut of a big chunk of it just for the pure thrill of seeing tears in Tara's eyes as she stared in the mirror in misery yet again. But that also meant that her mother was gone. Her mother was her savior, most teenage girls wouldn't be caught dead with their mothers but Tara and Samantha Maclay were inseparable. She remembered with a small smile how her mom would come into her room late at night and teach her spells, tell her fairytales our just sit with her in silence, waiting for the chaos of the next mornings beatings and harsh language. Tempers where short with the Maclay men, one wrong move would result in a punch, our slap and cruel words about her inadequacy in the kitchen, her stutter, her body. When her mother died she had been devastated, and scared. Her Mother had always seemed to pacify her father. Calm him whenever Tara had made him exceptionally angry, and Donny never hit his mother and would never hit Tara in their mother's presence. At the time she had prayed that she was wrong that her father would take pity on her and her brother wouldn't do too much harm to her frail skinny and devastated body, which was caused by a number of things, amongst them where here nerves and her fathers need to have a presentable family which meant Tara could not be fat. She prayed that Cousin Beth would leave her alone. Wouldn't taunt her about how no boy in there school would ever touch her with a ten foot pole, not that Tara minded that anyway.

Now it was seven weeks into her freshmen year of college and Tara Found herself alone. She had always felt like an outsider. Like she never quit fit in. But there had always been people around. Sure most of them were yelling, mocking, our hitting her, but they were there. Here in college she seemed invisible. Like everyone just looked right past her, like she never even existed. She was okay with that for now. If people didn't notice her then no one would see who and what she was. But she still felt so lonely all the time. Even her roommate, Carry Sinter seemed to be oblivious to her, except her first day in the room, Carry hadn't spoken more than ten words to her. She remembered that day and cringed silently while working on her sketch for her art class that was due in four days.

"Hey there." Greeted an all too perky look at me I'm a cheerleader voice. "I'm Carry what's your name."

"T-t-tara Mac-clay." God her stutter was getting worse and worse, she cringed at the look on the small blonde haired fair skinned girls face. Her eyebrows raised, smile turned into a cruel smirk and her blue eyes, that Tara had thought were actually very pretty suddenly turned cold on her.

"Jeez, I would hate to see how long it would take you to get out an actual sentence." Tara blushed deeply and bowed her head standing there not saying a word. "Anyway, I most likely won't be her most of the time, I'll be at my boyfriend's he's in a fraternity," She looked at Tara as though she could never understand the importance of that piece of information. "But don't think that gives you an invitation to take any of my stuff, our food." She opened the small fridge which had one of the shelves completely full with fruits sodas and candy bars. "Keep your chubby little hands of." She pointed warningly at Tara and then left.

The fact that Tara, barley had any money, and could barely afford to eat never seemed to enter Carry's mind. The fact that Carry's Parents were filthy rich and Carry exceptionally spoiled did however matter to Tara. Even though Tara never expected handouts our charity she was hungry and tired and Carry never seemed to actually eat her food. The fruit went bad and Tara ended up throwing it away so she could actually sit in the room without her stomach turning over. Tara was starting to think that Carry wasn't only spoiled but a bitch as well. She and Cousin Beth might actually get along. Just two days ago Tara had spent what little she had on some cup of noodle soup. She came into the room to find Carry eating one. When Tara had said something Carry had rolled her eyes said she was being over dramatic and to get a life. Tara had lost it. She was tired, hungry, poor, and pissed.

"I don't think you get it." Tara was surprised to hear no stutter. Carry looked up with another spoonful of noodles only inches from her face obviously surprised by Tara's tone. "I only have ten dollars for food a week, and I'm not sure that's even going to last the rest of the year, then I have to get a job and go to school full time, while maintaining a B average to keep my scholarship and grants, so please don't take what little I have."

Tara sighed at the memory of her forceful voice. She usually wasn't one to confront people. She would let them walk all over her. But there was something about Carry and all the ignorant and hurtful things that kept popping into her head that her family had said and done to her that had set Tara off that day. Tara looked down at the sketch she had been working on. She had no idea where the images kept coming from. The assignment had been vague; draw someone who means a great deal to you. She had meant to draw her mother, but this image of this girl kept popping into her head. She was beautiful that was obvious. Long curly dark hair, deep chocolate eye's a slightly dimpled smile that was rare to show itself. A lean body incased in a pair of dark jeans and a white tank top, a leather jacket in was being held by her left hand and a tribal tattoo adorned her right bicep. She was wearing heavy black combat style boots on her feet. She was sitting on a chair which turned so the back was facing forward, her legs straddling it. Her arms where crossed over the top of the chair. Somehow Tara knew this girl was real, and she was calling to her, because all though a small smile adorned those lips, the eye's she had drawn were dull, empty, like the soul that lived there was dying. Tara stood and shook her head as if she was trying to get these ridiculous thoughts out of her head and grabbed her jacket. This room was becoming too small for her. She needed out.

'God damn bitch' it was all she could think at the moment. The funny thing was that Faith had no idea who she was thinking about. Gwendolyn, for lying, is manipulating her, making her feel useless, stupid, and insignificant. Our Buffy, for beating the crap out of her, for lying to her and her friends, for being the fucking goody toe shoes she always was and being god damn fucking right all the damn time. Maybe it was her mother for being a fucking drunk bitch who didn't give a damn about her, who ignored her. Beat her and eventually sold her to anyone who would pay, for ruining her. For Josephine, her watcher for dying for leaving her, the only person who ever thought Faith was worth a damn, and she had to go and die. "GOD DAMN BITCH." Faith screamed, drawing quite a bit of attention to herself as she limped her way to her 'Spartan' hotel room. She wanted to cry. She wanted it to end. Wasn't there anybody who actually gave a shit about her? The answer seemed to be no. No one cared. No one gave a rats ass weather she lived or died. No one cared if she showed up to the Scooby meetings. What she didn't get though is why she kept on falling into the trap. She should have remembered that no one could be trusted. No parental figures, she learned that in the foster system, carted around from home to home, beaten starved and abandoned time and time again. No friends could be trusted; they would turn you over to a cop, a drug dealer, or a pimp for a mere fifty bucks, sometimes less if they were desperate enough. She learned that in her years on the streets of Boston. And know she just found out that her own watchers couldn't be trusted. They would sell her out, betray her, and use her. Well fuck em. Fuck em all. Faith thought bitterly. She stopped and leaned up against a wall as the world started to spin around her. 'Did B really have to fuck me up this bad.' She thought bitterly trying to get her bearings again, she was unaware of the soft gentle blue eye's that had been watching her walk across the campus and then lean on a dorm wall for support. She wasn't aware of the too skinny girl with to large clothes walk up to her. She only looked up at the quit clearing of a throat that was obviously meant to get her attention. When Faith looked up, clear blue eye's met hers. So blue so beautiful that Faith almost thought she was dreaming. Her heart skipped a beat. Her mind stopped working as those eyes looked into hers, concern, concern for her.

"Um a-are you a-all r-r-right." Faith raised an eyebrow, for some reason she wanted to say no as a matter of fact she wasn't alright. She was pissed, hurt, and completely devastated. Plus she felt completely empty inside. Like a hole had taken residence in her heart and just kept growing and growing until that's all that was left. God why were those crystal sky blue eyes looking at her like she was actually worth something. Instead Faith straightened up pushed herself of the wall and said. "Five by five." and moved past the stranger towards her rat infested hotel room. She had only managed to take two steps before she faltered due to her injured knee giving out, instead of falling to the ground like Faith thought she would two soft but strong hands wrapped around her holding her up.

" Y-you d-don't look f-five by f-f-five." The girl paused. "Whatever th-that m-m-means." The blonde helped Faith stand up straight. "Were d-do you l-live I'll he-help you g-get there." Faith got her footing back then pushed away from the blonde girl. Turning to look at her a deadly glare set in place.

"I don't need any god damn help." She hissed. Her glare softened when the girl flinched, backed away, and bent her head so her hair was covering her face in an act of submission. 'Great know I feel bad for snapping at a complete stranger who's just trying to help me.' "Look I don't need help okay, I just want to go home and get some sleep but I don't need help alright."

"O-o-o-kay, I'm so-sorry I'll j-just g-go." She turned around walking off. Faith sighed great she just crushed the girl.

"Hey," The blonde turned. "What's your name?"

"Tara." She said quietly.

"Faith," Tara smiled at her a soft crooked smile that made Faith heart skip a beat. "Thanks Tara, for you know offering to help. Didn't mean to snap at you."

"It's o-okay. It's a sm-small town, maybe I'll s-see you a-around?"

"Yeah okay." Faith shrugged thinking she would never see the girl again.

Tara couldn't believe it. She recognized those eyes that held such disdain for not only her but for everyone and everything around her. Those dead almost soulless eyes, begging for help. Faith, it suited her. 'She looked awful.' thought Tara. She wondered who had heart her, and why they had done that to her. A women, or a girl perhaps, by the whole bitch comment. She wished that Faith would have let her help. She hoped Faith could actually make it home. She thought of actually following her to make sure but thought that would be a little to stocker like for her taste. So instead she made her way back to her dorm room. As she crawled into her bed and closed her eyes she said a prayer to the Goddess to protect Faith that night, and to maybe bring her some peace.

Her dreams were disturbed that night by images of Faith, Faith with blood on her hands, pain and anger in her eyes, Faith killing a man from a rooftop at an airport, and then an older man in his apartment. Faith bleeding in a truck a wound in her stomach, Faith in a hospital bed, waking up with empty eyes, and a cool temper. Then Faith begging a man to take her life in the rain in an alley crying, Faith in a jail cell no real expression on her face. Just utter and complete emptiness. Tara woke with a start the next morning. Sweat falling from her face, tears in her eyes. Goddess she had to save that girl. How though she didn't know. She only knew a name. She would have to search, she had to, she had to.

Buffy was gone, Faith was alone again. She hated being alone. She had wanted to ask Buffy to stay she wanted to trust Buffy, no she wanted to trust somebody anybody. Images of the blonde, and blue eyed Tara kept flashing through her brain, haunting her throughout the night. She had seen more compassion in those strangers' eyes than she had seen in her own mothers eyes during her entire childhood. No, no she couldn't trust anyone. She couldn't trust Buffy, Xander, Willow, Giles, Oz, and especially Tara, she didn't even know Tara. Faith closed her eyes, blocking out the whole world. But all's she could see where Tara's beautiful eyes, god Faith craved to see them in person again. She opened her eyes again to see her dingy disgusting hotel room. She stood, she needed to get out of there, everything was just too depressing. She threw on a pair of jeans and her boots and left the room walking towards Main Street. She couldn't afford to shop, but she liked to watch the families and pretend to be the last member.

She sat on a bench just watching and wondering why she hadn't been born into one of the family's that surrounded her. But she wasn't, she was born to a one women family. A women who hated her, who drank, who used drugs, and who ignored her completely when she wasn't beating her with a belt or her fists. Faith sighed, god she hated her life.

"Be-beautiful isn't I-it?" Came a soft voice from behind her. Faith turned, Tara was standing right behind her a slight crooked smile on her face, her hands clasped in front of her. "The fa-family's h-having fun j-just being ha- ha-happy." Faith turned away scooting over, Tara took that as her invitation and sat next to Faith.

"Bet you got a family just like that." Faith said pointing to a man and women with two small children. The man was carrying a few shopping bags and the two small children where making funny faces at each other and then laughing when one made a particularly good one. Tara smiled, trying to remember the good times that came with her family.

"If it w-wa-was up to my m-mother yes my life w-wo-would have been exactly li-like that every day."

"But?" Faith looked at Tara who was staring at the man and the son of the small family.

"But, M-my f-fa-father wasn't a n-n-n-nice man." Faith turned away. "H-he used to B-beat me, c-call me names, M-m-make me f-f-feel like I wasn't w-w-worthy of h-his family. D-donny, my brother, w-was d-definatly m-m-my fathers son."

"But your mom was nice?" Tara gave a wide crooked smile, and nodded enthusiastically. Faith couldn't help but smile. "Why are you telling me this?" Tara looked at her and shrugged.

"I d-don't know." Tara looked down. They sat for a while watching the goings on the crowded streets, until Tara stood and looked down at Faith. "I would a-ask you I-if y-you wanted s-some c-coffee, but I d-don't have a-any money." Tara shrugged.

"It's cool, don't drink coffee anyway, stunts my growth." Faith said. Tara chuckled lightly.

"I ha-have some j-juice and s-some food, not m-much but s-so-some, if y-you want." Faith looked up at Tara trying to find any hint of malice our deception in her eyes. Faith couldn't seem to find any. Finally, Faith decided it was better than being alone. She nodded and got up walking next to Tara as they made their way to the college.

"So you go to the college?" Tara nodded. "Whatcha studying?"

"G-generals, I'm g-going to be a t-teacher, and s-some a-a-art classes." Faith just nodded. It was strange, there was mostly silence but she didn't feel the need to fill the silence with her sarcastic remarks, our stories involving alligators our her being naked. They just walked in a content silence.

They were in her dorm sitting on her bed eating soup and drinking juice. Faith kept on looking up at Tara. It was strange; when she first met the girl last night she didn't think Tara was much to look at, except for those eyes now faith was really looking at her. Fair skin, honey blonde hair, a long swan like neck, and full pouty lips that would set into a crooked smirk from time to time. Faith swallowed hard trying for once not to act on impulse it was harder than she thought it would be. It was so tempting to kiss Tara, to be forward and demanding and just take what she wanted from Tara right at this moment like she did with everyone else. She never really cared about the after math of her actions before, but this woman was different. She was so vulnerable yet strong at the same time. She was sweet and innocent, but she knew the harsh realities of the world. Faith wondered if maybe Tara expected her story, since Tara had told her hers. She usually wasn't one for sharing, but she found herself wanting to tell Tara everything. But she couldn't bring herself to trust that Tara wouldn't judge her, hurt her.

"So is this what you eat every day?"

"N-no I have a s-s-small allowance, I-in the caf-cafetaria a very s-small allowance."

"How small is small?"

"En-enough for a sm-small breakfast eve-everyday." Faith nodded. And looked around the room, and noticed the herbs. She narrowed her eyes; Red had used some of those herbs. Then there where all the old books that Tara had left on her night stand. Tara followed Faiths gaze, she swallowed hard she had meant to put those away. Faith looked back at Tara, eyebrows raised a small smirk on her face.

"So you a witch?" Tara swallowed and nodded, waiting for the ridicule and laughter.

" I p-prefer w-wi-wi-wicca, but y-yes." Tara looked down hiding her face in her hair. Faith studied her, watched as she hide in practiced submission.

"That's cool, my friend Willow, well she's not really a friend more an acquaintance, she's trying to get in with the Wicca life style." Tara looked up, looking at Faith quizzically.

"Y-you d-don't think it's s-strange?"

"Hey to each their own. Who am I to judge?" Faith just shrugged. They sat in silence for a while longer Faith taking occasional bites. Contemplating Tara's thin frame and tired eyes. "You know what I do when I don't have a lot of money, which is always, I go to this homeless shelter about three miles from here, get a hot meal for free, they don't ask questions." Tara looked up at Faith, she smiled slightly she had never thought of that.

"Thanks, I'll keep that in mind."

"I should get going, things to do." Faith said standing, and she smiled at Tara. "Thanks it was fun, I'll see you around."

"Bye."

Faith couldn't stop thinking about Tara, those eyes, that mouth, and her little half smile that drove Faith wild. Faith shook her head; she couldn't get involved with Tara. Because Tara wasn't the kinda girl you could just have a good role in the hay with and then slap her on the ass and say 'see ya.' No Tara was an all-out commitment go on dates love tell you get old and can't remember your name, but could never forget Tara, kinda girl. And that wasn't Faith's style. In fact Faith wasn't good enough for a girl like that. And for all she knew Tara was as straight as an arrow. Faith sighed, now all's she had to do was stop thinking about the beauty that was Tara. Sitting in the cemetery and keeping her senses up just in case B came around, someone she really didn't want to talk to, she waited to get some action for the night. But all the vamps seemed to be on vacation. God she was bored, deciding to give up for the night she stood and walked towards her motel room. She thought about going to the Bronze but didn't like the idea of running into the scoobs. Just staying at home reading some comics and trying to watch an old movie on her TV if she could get the damn thing to work," was the best option she seemed to have. It would have to do.

Tara wasn't sure where all her inspiration was coming from. But her hand couldn't sit still the rest of the day. There were pictures of flowers and her mother, and mountains that reminded her of her home. And now the one she was drawing. It wasn't something that she would have ever drawn before but something screamed at her to get it out. It was a picture of a man with blond wavy hair, cruel, but crystal eyes, he was wearing a thin t-shirt, and jeans stained with oil and paint, his feet were bare. In his left hand was a bottle of whisky half empty, in his right his belt raised above his head ready to strike. On the ground in front of him was a small girl, huddled into herself. Tara breathed heavily as she drew her mother in the corner of the room a beautiful women with light brown hair, aqua eyes and bruises, tears running down her face. She was screaming something at the man reaching out for the small child. A tear slip past her eye's, this seen was so for in her past but she could remember it like it was yesterday. And the scars on her back never failed to remind her of her punishment for whatever crime she had committed that evening. Tara was tired now; she looked at her latest drawing and felt like a lifetime of pain and heart ache had seeped through her and on to the page in front of her, and drained every last bit of energy out of her. Setting her sketch pad and any loose paper away in its appropriate place, Tara sighed getting under her covers, hoping for a good nights rest. When she closed her eyes, a girl with dark hair, a wicked smirk and empty eyes filled her imagination, she seeped into her dreams.

Depression seemed to be a constant companion in Faith's life. But now when she was most afraid of it setting in again, it was nowhere in sight. She was content, not exactly happy, but okay with where she was at the moment. She guessed it had something to do with the woman walking beside her. They had known each other for a weak, everyday going to that homeless shelter to get something to eat. The volunteers at the shelter knew Faith and greeted her with excitement, and know where starting to expect Tara to come along with her. There was always plenty a food and not very much homeless in the actual shelter. Tara later learned that Sunnydale's homeless population was extremely low. Tara had her suspicions as to why, but didn't say anything. They had an easy and comfortable friendship. Which surprised both girls immensely since neither one had ever had any true friends. Faith looked over at the blond women. Took a deep breath and spoke.

"Tare, are umm…, are you like my best friend our something." Tara looked at Faith and stopped walking, looking intently at Faith she gave her a crooked smile.

"I don't Kn-now, I know y-your mine." Faith smiled, and continued walking.

"Yeah, yeah I think your mine to, strange never had a best friend before."

"Me e-either."

It was getting close to Christmas. And Faith had spent weeks racking her brain to figure out what to get Tara. There were a million and one things she could think of that Tara would love but Faith wouldn't be able to buy with her lack of funds. There were also a million things Faith could get with the little money she had and Tara would like it but not love it. She also had to consider the Scoobs. OZ, Willow, Xander, Giles, and Buffy. Plus Joyce and Cordelia. Faith sighed she definitely didn't have the money to get them all something supper nice. In the end Tara had ended up with a pair of really cheap drawing pencils. Faith had no doubt that they weren't the best material to work with, but in Faiths book a pencils a pencil. And Buffy likes all things girly a pretty shirt from the thrift store would work, and Joyce a scarf from that same thrift store. She washed them in the sink and the Buffster wouldn't know the difference. Xander was easy, she had a few x-men comics she could just give to him. She hadn't actually paid for them, her old watcher had bought them to keep her entertained, she would rather not part with them but he would give her a goofy smile and maybe that was worth it. Giles she had gotten his while raiding a vamps nest. It was a book, what else would you get Giles, there were allot of demon references in it, as well as the history of some of the world apocalypses, Faith just hoped he didn't have a copy, Cordy was the one she was sure wouldn't like what she got her. Faith had heard that the queen wasn't as vapid as she appeared and actually did really well in school, so she went into a cheap second hand bookstore and bought a ratty old Shakespeare book. It was only nine dollars and if C didn't like it well tough shit. A mixed tape of her favorite bands, ones she knew Oz would like, was a cheap but thoughtful present for the guy. Now for Willow, she was the most difficult; she had decided to go for a second hand book on astrology that was most likely out of date, but only cost her ten dollars and she was done with her holiday shopping. Looking down at all her gifts wrapped in newspaper with the appropriate person's name on them, she smiled lightly. Twenty nine dollars and she was done. Faith sat down heavily and then groaned when a knock came at the door. Buffy was standing on the other end looking like she would rather be anywhere else.

"Hey." Faith greeted moving aside to let Buffy inside.

"Hi, how are you."

"Five by five." Faith sat on her bed and looked at Buffy. Faith was surprised when she found that she wasn't angry at Buffy anymore. "What can I do for you?"

"Um actually I was just wondering if you had any plans for Christmas, maybe if you don't you could come to my house, moms making a special turkey dinner."

"Mom made you ask huh," Faith smirked at Buffy's blush and stammer to deny what Faith new was true, "thanks, but I got a friend coming over, she aint real comfortable with strangers you know." Buffy raised her eyebrows in disbelief.

"Well if she wants she can come to, um well, I have to go patrol," Buffy paused at the door and looked back at Faith, "I'd really like it if you came Faith." She opened the door, and was about to leave when Faith remembered the presents.

"B wait," Buffy paused by the door looking back at Faith, who picked up two crudely wrapped packages and handed them to Buffy, "in case I don't show up." Buffy looks down at the packages with her and her mom's names on them and smiles at Faith. Faith just shrugs. "They're crap." Buffy wasn't sure what to say to that. From the look of the hotel Faith was staying in and how much the girl ate when it wasn't on her dime, and the way Faiths jeans were patched and worn, the fact that she had spent any money on Christmas presents was something Buffy found incredible, it didn't matter if the presents were twenty five cent toys you got out of those machines at the super market, which by the size of the presents, they weren't.

"Thanks Faith see you around." Faith nodded and watched Buffy leave. She smiled maybe Tara would want to come with her to Buffy's


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

**What best friends do.**

Faith couldn't help but smile at Tara, who was fidgeting beside her as they stood at Buffy's door. Tara looked at Faith and gave her a nervous smile. Faith reached out and placed her hand on Tara's bicep and squeezed it slightly. When Faith had first suggested going to dinner at the Summers home Tara had only blinked a few times and tried to answer but her stutter was so bad she couldn't get it out. Which was answer enough for Faith. Tara was nervous that Buffy and Mrs. S wouldn't like her, our that she would get so nervous that her stutter would make it impossible for her to be understood by the two other women. Faith didn't want to talk Tara into doing anything that she didn't want to do so had said that they wouldn't go. An hour later Tara looked at Faith over a game of gin that they were playing.

"F-Faith, I uh think you s-should go to your friends. I mean Mrs. Summers i-is ex-expecting you right."

"I'm only going if your goin. And I don't want you to be uncomfortable Tare." Tara smiled and looked down.

"I'll be okay if your there." she said quietly, "a-and maybe if you d-draw attention away from me if I s-start stt-tt-sturing to much." Faith gave Tara a rare full on grin.

"Hey, I'm the best at getting unwanted and wanted attention." Tara laughed and nodded in agreement.

So here they were standing at Buffy's door Faith waiting for the ok from Tara to knock. Finally Tara took a deep breath and nodded Faith raised her hand and knocked two quick knocks smiling at Tara who was now tapping her hand on her thigh in nervousness. The door opened and Buffy looked at Faith and Tara, it took Buffy a few seconds to process the unlikely duo in front of her. Faith with black leather pants on, a tight white somewhat nicer than her usual blouses, and a smirk on her a face covered in heavy makeup. And the yet unidentified girl with her honey blond hair, long sleeved loose pink peasant top, a flowing tan skirt, and a shy smile on her make up free face. Buffy blinked and then remembered her manners moving aside so both girls could come into her home.

"Hey Faith you came."

"Stating the obvious there B." Faith raised an eyebrow at Buffy who scowled slightly at Faith. "This is my friend Tara, Tara Buffy." Faith shook Tara's hand. Buffy still looked a little confused. She was studying Tara, almost as though she couldn't believe Faith had been telling the truth about actually having a friend.

"Um yeah nice to meet you Tara, come on in guys." She led them to the living room where Joyce was stocking another log on the fire. To which Faith raised her eyebrows at. Buffy smiled and just shrugged. Joyce looked up and smiled at the new comers. She stood and gave Faith an awkward hug.

"Faith you came. Buffy said you most likely wouldn't. Oh who's your friend Buffy mentioned something about a friend."

"This is Tara, Tare Mrs. Summers."

"N-nic-nice to m-meet yo-you." Tara blushes and looks down. Joyce looks at Faith questioningly. But Faith just smiles.

"Hey Mrs. S, we got a few more gifts for your tree. These are from Tare." She hands Mrs. S three square packages. "And this is for Tare." Faith hands over a small neatly wrapped package."

"Thank you Tara, That's very thoughtful. And Faith thank you for your gifts."

"Not a problem Ms. S"

Things looked like they were going well. Presents, dinner and a quiet, somewhat intelligent conversation. Intelligent conversation was something Faith was surprised she actually liked. It was nice having someone talk to her like she wasn't some kind of idiot, or a five year old. But then of course Angel showed up, 'in Buffy's Bedroom like a freaky stalker' thought Faith as she and Tara sat with Joyce drinking hot coca. The fact that he was insane didn't ease Faith's weird vibes any. Buffy had rushed out, promising to tell Faith everything as soon as things got resolved. Faith wasn't going to hold her breath. But she wasn't going to leave Tara our Buffy's mom alone just in case Angel came back to the house with a little less soul than any of the Scooby's liked. Buffy might trust the boy but Faith sure as hell didn't.

Then it started to snow. Faith couldn't believe it. She remember winters in Boston, how it would snow and she would stand out in the sidewalk next to her apartment and spread her hands letting the pure white snow fall on her. Without realizing it she found herself doing just that. Relishing in one of the only good memories of her childhood. Wondering if she would ever forget the bad ones. She didn't notice Tara standing on the porch looking out, smiling softly at Faiths childlike demeanor as she twirled around. Tara wasn't a stranger to snow, her grandparents had lived in Ohio and her family had spent a few winter breaks with them, she also remember a few good memories of her and her brother having snowball fights, when her brother was actually still at least a little nice to her. She stepped out of the porch and carefully with the little amount of snow available she made a small snowball. Smirking to herself. It wasn't the greatest snowball but for now it would do. Taking careful aim and then she hurled it at Faith with all her might, which she knew wasn't hard at all. The small ball of compact snow hit Faith square in the back. Faith froze in shock, and astonishment. Then as realization of who was responsible for the very small but very cold snowball hitting her in the back she turned around and looked at Tara, a crooked smile adorned her lips, but she was trying to pull of an innocent how can you accuse me of such a thing, face. A sly smirk worked its way onto Faith's lips as she stoked towards Tara.

Joyce couldn't believe what she was seeing, she had only met Faith once or twice before but she never saw her this care free. This much like a kid. And in that moment Joyce realize that's exactly what Faith was. Just a kid, just like Buffy. Two kids thrown into a role that made them age faster than they should. And Joyce had a feeling that Faith had grown up way before she became a slayer. Joyce got a lump in her throat. She thought about what she had said to Buffy. Yes Faith loved slaying, but maybe that's because that's the only thing she had. No future in school, no real friends not until Tara and from what Joyce understood this relationship was relatively new. From what she saw not much of a love life. Yes she had heard of Faith's get some get gone methods, but that wasn't really love. So what made Buffy worthy of a future and not Faith. Joyce sighed feeling ashamed of herself. Of course she knew as a mother she was naturally inclined to want the best for her daughter, a nice home, good clothes on her back, good food in her stomach, and a bright future. But now watching Faith run around, throwing light snowballs at a giggling Tara, she wondered who had wanted that for Faith. She sighed and shook her head. She'd have to talk to Giles and Buffy later about that. But for now she wanted a good old fashion snowball fight.

Tara hadn't felt so at peace since her mother died. She never realized how good it could feel to have someone to call a friend. Of course not all her feelings were exactly plutonic. She found herself daydreaming about Faiths lips, and eyes and her incredibly soft skin. Not to mention that dimpled smile that could melt ice. No matter what she did she couldn't get the fantasy of running her hands over Faiths cheeks out of her head. Faith would most likely laugh, thinking Tara was joking if Tara ever confessed her true feeling for her best friend, and then after realizing she wasn't would tell her she thought of her just as a friend and then run away screaming. But it was hard not thinking of Faith that way. Everything that came out of her mouth seemed to be some kind of sexual innuendo. Which Tara knew to be more of a defenses mechanism than anything else. They know spent every chance they could together. Faith would always be at the dorms. Reading whenever Tara had to study, she had actually started to read Tara's texts books and Tara had given Faith a notebook in which she would write down questions to things she didn't understand. Then when Tara was done studying would ask her to explain it to her. Tara had actually found that these little sessions, some of which lasted hours helped her to do better on her exams and on her assignments.

Now of course there was the whole vampire thing. Until about three days after Christmas, Tara had known about vampires and of course Slayers. But she had never put Faith and the Scooby gang in with that world. Of course now it was so obvious that Tara felt a little bit stupid. It wasn't until those three vampires came out of the shadows, and taunted the two of them about what good little snacks they would be, and then Faith staking them with a smile, and without even breaking a sweat, that Tara put two and two together. She had a best friend for a slayer. Now that Tara new about the slaying, she could go with her to help. She had a few spells that she could use to help defend Faith a little bit. They still talked, although Tara did most of the talking. Faith would make a few comments, which would give Tara a little bit of insight to Faith but nothing about her past our her secrets. She knew Faith was hurt, more times than anybody should have been in ten lifetimes, in her short life. Tonight Faith was supposed to come over and hang out for a little while. And Tara was a little nervous. She had some extra money now that she had at least one meal at the homeless shelter taken care of during the week, so she had gotten some Chinese food from a restaurant on Main Street. She smiled when there was a knock on the door. And her smile widened when she caught sight of Faith standing on the other side with a bag full of Chinese food.

"L-looks like we're going to h-have a whole lot of f-food today." Faith laughed a little spotting the food on Tara's desk.

"Well it's good left over." Tara smiled and nodded in agreement.

Two hours later they found themselves on the floor, empty boxes of Chinese food all around them, laughing hysterically. At what neither were sure, any more. They knew it had started out with a simple choke told by Tara that was so bad it was funny. Then escaladed with funny stories from their past and then had turned into laughing simply because the other was laughing. Finally they both calmed, only slight chuckles bubbling up now and then.

"So d-did Buffy ever t-tell you what ha-happened with A-angel?" Tara asked. Faith snorted softly.

"Course not, why tell me anything. To them I'm just a spare they can call when needed." Tara nodded and looked down and sighed.

"Sorry Faith." She said and smiled at her gently.

"It's okay Blondie, at least I got you."

"Always." She whispered, and smiled to confirm when Faith looked up surprised at Tara


End file.
